View Poll Results: Is spanking okay?

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  • Yes

    29 80.56%
  • No

    7 19.44%
  • I don't know

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Thread: Spanking?

  1. #1
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    Spanking?

    With a pending vote in California (where else?), do you think spanking is okay?

    spanking article

    The bill, which is still being drafted, will be written broadly, she added, prohibiting ``any striking of a child, any corporal punishment, smacking, hitting, punching, any of that.'' Lieber said it would be a misdemeanor, punishable by up to a year in jail or a fine up to $1,000, although a legal expert advising her on the proposal said first-time offenders would probably only have to attend parenting classes.

    The idea is encountering skepticism even before it's been formally introduced. Beyond the debate among child psychologists -- many of whom believe limited spanking can be effective -- the bill is sure to face questions over how practical it is to enforce and opposition from some legislators who generally oppose what they consider ``nanny government.''

    ``Where do you stop?'' asked Assemblyman Chuck DeVore, R-Irvine, who said he personally agrees children under 3 shouldn't be spanked but has no desire to make it the law. ``At what point are we going to say we should pass a bill that every parent has to read a minimum of 30 minutes every night to their child? This is right along those same lines.''
    Brian

  2. #2
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    Re: Spanking?

    with limitations,yes. else u have the kids growing up drug addicts,murderers or whoes

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  3. #3
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    Re: Spanking?

    limited spanking can be effective
    Agree. I would suggest they stop wasting time on this and focus on how to better deal with actual child abusers.
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  4. #4
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    Re: Spanking?

    Yeah, spanking your children is perfectly acceptable. Beating them up, physically harming them (intentionally), etc. is not.

    There are already laws in place against child abuse in California. Heck, we even have laws that require teachers in grubberment schools to report any suspicions of child abuse to the police. We don't need any more grubberment control over pro-active parenting. Especially when they're so broadly worded that they can be used as a tool against parents who are doing a good job rearing children, like this one clearly can be.

    A law against inactive parenting might be in order however. That's certainly a serious problem that isn't being addressed well enough.

  5. #5
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    Re: Spanking?

    I shudder to view the voting results. First of all you can raise a child without physically attacking them and have them grow up to be a productive and intelligent human being. That alone tells me that you shouldn't hit a child. They can learn cause and effect and consequences without having to use your adult frame to pound on a creature that is probably less than 1/6 of your mass. People will tell you that they were spanked as a child and they're a better person for it. That's fine. I don't believe that you are required to beat your child to pound them into the person you think they should be. Spanking doesn't teach a child how to be a more considerate and compassionate human being. It teaches them how to avoid spanking. They've never learned that it's wrong to do something. They just learned to do it when you're not looking.

    My co-worker recently confided (as a father of 3 with his 4th on the way) that he'd tried spanking his children. He said that he actually witnessed his children become more violent as a result. He and his wife gave up and tried different approaches and found better ways to teach and control their children's actions. This may not be representative of all parents and children but that further convinces me that you should raise your child without corporal punishment.

    So if there's legislation to get us as human beings to use child-raising methods that don't involve flogging a helpless child then I'm all for it. As a parent it's tiring and frustrating to get a child to learn important lessons but it can be done without taking the easy way out and smack them around until all you have to do is flash a hand to shut them up. What "limitations" can we possibly put on that? Open palm, on the rear not exceeding a speed of 4 feet\s?
    Last edited by Snowball 2; 01-19-2007 at 10:31 AM.

  6. #6
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    Re: Spanking?

    This is another fine example of the government overstepping it's bounds. There seems to be a group of people that cannot distinguish between actual child abuse and one option for disciplining a kid. What's next? You can't restrict their internet privileges or time on the Xbox? Spanking should be left alone. Child abuse, on the other hand, should be targeted. It's not the only option in parenting, but it shouldn't be limited. I don't know what the rest of you guys had, but my parents used what worked best for whoever screwed up. As we got older, other things, like TV and internet restrictions were employed? Not because they gave up on spanking, it was simply a more effective way of doling out consequences. Sure, there are those parents who do abuse the kid, but let's not blacklist a majority of parents for a particular option used in bringing up their child.

    SB, spanking is not an attack on a child---when done properly. Whenever we got spanked (or anything else doled out), we knew why we got it. Secondly, yeah, it stung, but only for a few minutes and there weren't marks left. Generally, it was one or two swats, so it was controlled. My parents never did it when they were angry, but they also didn't try to pass it off like they were pleased with the situation. The buttocks tend to have more padding, and if you limit it to one place with just a few swats, you're not going to leave a mark (unless the kid has a condition where they bruise easily). You shouldn't be literally pounding their ass---which I think some parents don't understand. There's a fine line between spanking and simply beating a child. The problem is, people do not, and sometimes cannot, separate these two. I think when you start hitting them on the body, face, legs, etc. it's degrading and gets into abuse.

    Personally, I think the effective methods used to correct a child most certainly differ from child to child. Anybody that has siblings should be able to see that what worked best for one didn't always work best for the other.
    Last edited by Big B-man; 01-19-2007 at 10:45 AM.

  7. #7
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    Re: Spanking?

    Quote Originally Posted by Snowball 2 View Post
    First of all you can raise a child without physically attacking them
    use your adult frame to pound on a creature that is probably less than 1/6 of your mass.
    beat your child to pound them into the person you think they should be.
    flogging a helpless child
    Those are all descriptions of things that are illegal in California (at least they sound like they are from what I know) and don't describe spanking, at least not in my view.
    Open palm, on the rear not exceeding a speed of 4 feet\s?
    That sounds like an aggressive spanking... again, in my view. I'd lean towards 2 feet/sec.

  8. #8
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    Re: Spanking?

    My parents spanked me and it didn't prevent me from shoplifting and getting caught...twice, smashing car windows in a parking lot when I was about 8 years old, taking drugs from when I was 15 til almost 22, becoming a vicious drunk for a year of my life, screwing off 3 years of college, etc. I had to learn later in life how to discipline myself because I never learned when I was a child. A hand to my ass was a horrible teacher.

  9. #9
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    Re: Spanking?

    Point taken, and exactly why it's not the only solution. On the same token, you can't guarantee that taking away a kid's Xbox won't produce the same results as you had in your choices.

    Spanking, revoking privileges, etc for punishment does NOT guarantee that the kid will turn out to be an angel. The parents can do their best to raise a child not to be a 5-star turd, but they can't force their kid to be good.

    It's like the saying goes "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink."

  10. #10
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    Re: Spanking?

    Quote Originally Posted by Snowball 2 View Post
    I shudder to view the voting results. First of all you can raise a child without physically attacking them and have them grow up to be a productive and intelligent human being. That alone tells me that you shouldn't hit a child. They can learn cause and effect and consequences without having to use your adult frame to pound on a creature that is probably less than 1/6 of your mass. People will tell you that they were spanked as a child and they're a better person for it. That's fine. I don't believe that you are required to beat your child to pound them into the person you think they should be. Spanking doesn't teach a child how to be a more considerate and compassionate human being. It teaches them how to avoid spanking. They've never learned that it's wrong to do something. They just learned to do it when you're not looking.

    My co-worker recently confided (as a father of 3 with his 4th on the way) that he'd tried spanking his children. He said that he actually witnessed his children become more violent as a result. He and his wife gave up and tried different approaches and found better ways to teach and control their children's actions. This may not be representative of all parents and children but that further convinces me that you should raise your child without corporal punishment.

    So if there's legislation to get us as human beings to use child-raising methods that don't involve flogging a helpless child then I'm all for it. As a parent it's tiring and frustrating to get a child to learn important lessons but it can be done without taking the easy way out and smack them around until all you have to do is flash a hand to shut them up. What "limitations" can we possibly put on that? Open palm, on the rear not exceeding a speed of 4 feet\s?

    lol..."physically attacking " "pound on a creature " "beat your child "

    Are you talking about spanking or abuse?

    If your kid is reaching for a red hot wood stove, do you smack his hand and say 'no', pick him up to keep him safe, or just let him burn himself? Which solution ges the point across with the least harm?

    This law looks like another great "call the authorities because someone's breaking the law!" excuse for people to be secure in judging others while remaining anonymous.

    I hate laws like this. So when you're in a grocery store and see a parent cross the line with physical violence on their kid, just dial 911 and go home thinking you've done a great deed. Never mind you could have walked up, confronted the unruly parent, and stated your objections. That'd take too much backbone. It's easier to pass a state law that makes me secure in telling on other people!

    Perhaps there's a fine line between responsible spanking and abuse. As Dutch mentioned child abuse laws should be adequate. To simply outright ban 'any striking of a child' is a little much, I can't wait to see Californians constantly dialing 911 to report their percieved violations of this law.
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  11. #11
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    Re: Spanking?

    Parents spanking their kids, yes only if the kid knows why he or she has been spanked. The kid should be more impressed because of the act of spanking, not because of the actual pain from the spanking.
    If spanking is being used sometimes it's rather important that both parents agree on it. Only one parent always performing the spanking should be avoided too.

    If someone else besides one of the parents does a spanking, ie. a youth leader, that's totally not ok. Imo.
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  12. #12
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    Re: Spanking?

    As long as spanking does not cross the line into child abuse, it is a violation of one's rights as a parent to mandate this by law. Government needs to stay out of our homes and let people choose their own methods of punishment. However, this doesn't surprise me for liberal Kalifornia, always looking to squash the rights of the people.

    As for my personal views on it, I'm 20 and I don't have kids nor am I married, but I don't plan on doing it to my kids. My parents may have spanked me a couple of times but most of my punishment was not physical. I think I turned out okay. However, my personal views are just that, my views, and it's not necessary to impose my views on everyone else. Spanking has generated good kids and bad kids, and non-physical punishment has done the same. It all depends on what you, as a parent, think is best, not what legislators do.
    Last edited by JungleMan; 01-19-2007 at 11:30 AM.
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  13. #13
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    Re: Spanking?

    Quote Originally Posted by smoked trout View Post
    lol..."physically attacking " "pound on a creature " "beat your child "

    Are you talking about spanking or abuse?
    There's a fine line between the two which you concede.

    If your kid is reaching for a red hot wood stove, do you smack his hand and say 'no', pick him up to keep him safe, or just let him burn himself? Which solution ges the point across with the least harm?
    Or tell them that it's hot and tell them firmly that it will burn them. Worked for my little girl. As with all lessons they learn through repetition so after the 2nd or 3rd time she picked up on it.

    This law looks like another great "call the authorities because someone's breaking the law!" excuse for people to be secure in judging others while remaining anonymous.

    I hate laws like this. So when you're in a grocery store and see a parent cross the line with physical violence on their kid, just dial 911 and go home thinking you've done a great deed. Never mind you could have walked up, confronted the unruly parent, and stated your objections. That'd take too much backbone. It's easier to pass a state law that makes me secure in telling on other people!
    I didn't know that most child abuse occurred in public places. Perhaps because they don't. You've somehow mistaken cowardice for wanting to protect children. Regardless nobody gets points for being a hero and you're always supposed to call the authorities in situations like that. People taking matters into their own hands has a poor track record. Approach a violent person and expect a violent situation. Or do you imagine you'd approach them, state your objections and they'd sheepishly agree with you and profess their sins before turning themselves in to the local deputy's office? I'd expect a reply that mirrors what people seem to think when someone tells them how they should punish their children. Their "line" may be drawn further back than yours but who are you to say? It's their right as it is yours.

    You can raise your child without hitting so why would you hit them?

  14. #14
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    Re: Spanking?

    Quote Originally Posted by Snowball 2 View Post
    I didn't know that most child abuse occurred in public places. Perhaps because they don't. You've somehow mistaken cowardice for wanting to protect children. Regardless nobody gets points for being a hero and you're always supposed to call the authorities in situations like that. People taking matters into their own hands has a poor track record. Approach a violent person and expect a violent situation. Or do you imagine you'd approach them, state your objections and they'd sheepishly agree with you and profess their sins before turning themselves in to the local deputy's office? I'd expect a reply that mirrors what people seem to think when someone tells them how they should punish their children. Their "line" may be drawn further back than yours but who are you to say? It's their right as it is yours.
    Angering and humiliating an abuser only makes abuse more likely to occur and in a more severe way, too.
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  15. #15
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    Re: Spanking?

    Quote Originally Posted by Snowball 2 View Post
    I didn't know that most child abuse occurred in public places. Perhaps because they don't. You've somehow mistaken cowardice for wanting to protect children. Regardless nobody gets points for being a hero and you're always supposed to call the authorities in situations like that. People taking matters into their own hands has a poor track record. Approach a violent person and expect a violent situation. Or do you imagine you'd approach them, state your objections and they'd sheepishly agree with you and profess their sins before turning themselves in to the local deputy's office? I'd expect a reply that mirrors what people seem to think when someone tells them how they should punish their children. Their "line" may be drawn further back than yours but who are you to say? It's their right as it is yours.

    You can raise your child without hitting so why would you hit them?
    To be clear, are you saying that people who spank their kids are violent people? Y/N.

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