Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 18
  1. #1
    Joined
    Sep 2000
    Location
    Long Beach CA
    Posts
    2,134

    Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Anybody have any information regarding Restraining Order hearings? I have obtained a Temporary Restraining Order against the ex of a woman I've been dating. The hearing to determine whether it will be a more permanent version is in a week. Would anyone have any advice on what to bring with me to court, what points I should focus on, etc.?

    Thanks.
    Black CoolCases D8000 2 x 120mm fans, RS480M2-IL, Athlon 64 3000+ Venice, 2 x 512 OCZ PC3500, 400W RaidMax PSU w/ 120mm fan. CPU, PSU, & case fans on black Sunbeam rheobus w/ LEDs removed.

  2. #2
    Joined
    Aug 2003
    Location
    West Richland, WA
    Posts
    6,397

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    I really have no idea but I would think having incidents documented would help, along with any witnesses to the incidents that you can find.
    Brian

  3. #3
    Joined
    Aug 2001
    Posts
    74,682

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Its not the sort of thing Id want to do without a lawyer. But to each his own.
    You want places/dates the works on this guy. Lots of detail.
    What you are looking for in an injunction....turning the TRO into something long lasting. I can only suggest detail.....records of what happened...people that saw what went on etc.

    Its his turn to speak. So you want to be in a position to counter
    his defense.
    Last edited by jimzinsocal; 05-01-2008 at 11:13 PM.

  4. #4
    Fluff n Stuff's Avatar
    Fluff n Stuff is offline ♫♪♫♪♪♫♪♫♫♪♫♪♪♫♪♫♪♪
    Joined
    May 2001
    Location
    South Seattle, Wa
    Posts
    12,389

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Generic advice for court: Bring three sets of paperwork. If you have a copy for yourself, bring one for the Judge, and bring one for the other guy... it will make it a LOT easier to get the Judge to enter your evidence. Write out your complaint in detail, but be able to sum it up verbally in less than 15 seconds. Provide all the details in print, provide the emotion in voice.

    In a Restraing Order situation, you are arguing to take away somebody's rights to travel and congregate... there HAS to be an overriding reason. There HAS to be fear of future injury. There HAS to be GOOD evidence of past harm, or threat of harm, on multiple occasions, even if it's not to the current victim. Dates, times, witnesses.

    Be reasonable about how much of his rights you are taking away... for example, keeping at least 500 feet from a house in a suburb is reasonable... banning him from driving by a business on the only highway in the region is not. You can't say he can NEVER be less than 500 feet in case they accidently meet in a Grocery Store... but you can ask for advice about that part at any Police Department. They'll know what's reasonable, and most of 'em will be willing to give you GOOD advice that will work locally.

    In the end, remember, a Restraining Order will only work against reasonable people; it won't stop a Criminal type... just watch the news. It's not fair, but if the guy is truly vicious and dangerous (and not just an assh*le), you may have to move to be safe.
    Last edited by Fluff n Stuff; 05-04-2008 at 02:31 AM.



  5. #5
    Joined
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Arizona's White Mountains
    Age
    73
    Posts
    3,630

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    I had a psycho ex bothering me for a while, stalking, phone calls at 2am, etc... I got a Smith & Wesson restraining order. Caught her letting the air out of my tires one night. Fired a few rounds into a big pine tree. The sound must have convinced her I was crazier that she was. Disclaimer: This was on my land in rural New Hampshire, the weapon was fired in a safe direction at a known target and there were NO other witneses. She probably could have called the cops, but then she'd have to explain night time trespass and destruction of property. And it would be my word against her word. She gave up harassing me.
    FRH
    If more sane people were armed the crazy ones would get off fewer shots.

    Win 7 Premium SP1 / MX 15 KDE / MEPIS 11

  6. #6
    Joined
    Aug 2001
    Posts
    74,682

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Every state has different TRO requirements.
    Maybe I misread the OP post but my understanding was the TRO has been granted. A Temporary solution.[60 or 90 days is typical/180 days max]
    And now he faces the follow up hearing where the character is allowed to defend himself in a back and forth.
    The result being one of two things:
    1. Extend the Restraint to some specified time period
    2. Lift the TRO

    My understanding is also? If nobody shows up for this "discussion hearing?"
    It simply goes away [the temp measure]

    The competing arguments
    1. Why to extend the terms
    2. Why that extension of time is not correct
    Last edited by jimzinsocal; 05-04-2008 at 01:37 PM.

  7. #7
    Joined
    Aug 2001
    Posts
    74,682

  8. #8
    Joined
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Kern River Valley, CA
    Age
    71
    Posts
    21,687

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Quote Originally Posted by Frank1946 View Post
    I had a psycho ex bothering me for a while, stalking, phone calls at 2am, etc... I got a Smith & Wesson restraining order. Caught her letting the air out of my tires one night. Fired a few rounds into a big pine tree. The sound must have convinced her I was crazier that she was. Disclaimer: This was on my land in rural New Hampshire, the weapon was fired in a safe direction at a known target and there were NO other witneses. She probably could have called the cops, but then she'd have to explain night time trespass and destruction of property. And it would be my word against her word. She gave up harassing me.
    It seems to me fear is always the most effective method. Be it a gun or a severe a$$ whooping. The trick is being smart enough not to get caught.

  9. #9
    Fluff n Stuff's Avatar
    Fluff n Stuff is offline ♫♪♫♪♪♫♪♫♫♪♫♪♪♫♪♫♪♪
    Joined
    May 2001
    Location
    South Seattle, Wa
    Posts
    12,389

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Quote Originally Posted by tucker View Post
    It seems to me fear is always the most effective method. Be it a gun or a severe a$$ whooping. The trick is being smart enough not to get caught.
    Speak loudly and carry a big shovel?!? I'm just not sure that's good advice, there Tuck...



  10. #10
    Joined
    Sep 2000
    Location
    Long Beach CA
    Posts
    2,134

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Thanks, fellas. What is in effect right now is a Temporary RO which started when the papers were served to him and will last until the hearing, which is on Thursday. That will be when the judge will decide whether to extend it to a longer period of time. I will be there; the perp might not show up which would probably mean a default judgment in my favor. This would be the best outcome in my mind; I don't want to even see the ratbastard. What is in effect right now is that he cannot call, email, text me, etc. nor come within 100 yards of me, my house, my car, or my workplace.

    The thought of using my own methods to enforce his behavior has crossed my mind but I don't want to break the law myself, nor risk being jailed. I hope the fear of incarceration due to the RO will be effective but I'm not going to be dropping my guard.
    Black CoolCases D8000 2 x 120mm fans, RS480M2-IL, Athlon 64 3000+ Venice, 2 x 512 OCZ PC3500, 400W RaidMax PSU w/ 120mm fan. CPU, PSU, & case fans on black Sunbeam rheobus w/ LEDs removed.

  11. #11
    Joined
    Aug 2001
    Posts
    74,682

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    OK. I figured thats where you were with the process.
    And good luck. If he's a no show? Your case will probably advance as you suggest.

  12. #12
    Joined
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Kern River Valley, CA
    Age
    71
    Posts
    21,687

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Quote Originally Posted by Fluff n Stuff View Post
    Speak loudly and carry a big shovel?!? I'm just not sure that's good advice, there Tuck...


    Not in 2008

  13. #13
    Joined
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Arizona's White Mountains
    Age
    73
    Posts
    3,630

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Quote Originally Posted by Fluff n Stuff View Post
    Speak loudly and carry a big shovel?!? I'm just not sure that's good advice, there Tuck...
    I didn't know Smith and Wesson made shovels.
    FRH
    If more sane people were armed the crazy ones would get off fewer shots.

    Win 7 Premium SP1 / MX 15 KDE / MEPIS 11

  14. #14
    Joined
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Pittsburgh
    Posts
    1,192

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Take a break from them till this blows over. Judement is an important measure of a potential spouse. clearly an error was made here. expect more of the same down the road. jmho, remember they dated this person not you.
    "The church says the earth is flat, but I know that it is round, for I have seen the shadow on the moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the church"[Ferdinand Magellan]
    "If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed." [Albert Einstein]
    "With or without (religion) you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion."[Physicist and Nobel Laureate Steven Weinberg]

  15. #15
    Joined
    Sep 2000
    Location
    Long Beach CA
    Posts
    2,134

    Re: Restraining Order hearing advice?

    Quote Originally Posted by darkknight View Post
    Take a break from them till this blows over. Judement is an important measure of a potential spouse. clearly an error was made here. expect more of the same down the road. jmho, remember they dated this person not you.
    Thanks; a point well taken. I am aware of this, and I haven't seen her in almost a month. Besides getting the freak to stop his activities (which have continued even though I have at least temporarily suspended relations with her over this), I still have to decide whether she's right or worth it or how forgiving towards her I'm willing to be about it. A lot is riding on the judge: if the RO is extended then maybe she and I can work it out; if not, it will be more difficult.
    Black CoolCases D8000 2 x 120mm fans, RS480M2-IL, Athlon 64 3000+ Venice, 2 x 512 OCZ PC3500, 400W RaidMax PSU w/ 120mm fan. CPU, PSU, & case fans on black Sunbeam rheobus w/ LEDs removed.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •