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  1. 03-01-2002, 05:37 PM #646
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    Re: Cap is NOT my cousin

    dl you can tell us the truth were all friends here that story is about you isn't it. There is no need to be ashamed about a little mis-understanding.

    Originally posted by dlcampbe
    My cousin owned one of the biggest and fastest-growing
    businesses in Miami, a furniture store. I convinced him
    that he needed to take a trip to Italy to check out the
    merchandise himself and because he was still single, he
    could check out all the hot Italian women and
    maybe get lucky.

    As he was checking into a hotel he struck up an
    acquaintance with a beautiful young lady. She only
    spoke Italian and he only spoke English--neither
    understood a word the other spoke. So he took out a
    pencil and a notebook and drew a picture of a taxi. She
    smiled, nodded her head and they went for a ride in the
    park. Later, he drew a picture of a table in a
    restaurant with a question mark and she nodded. So they
    went to dinner.

    After dinner he sketched two dancers and she was
    delighted. They went to several nightclubs, drank
    champagne, danced and had a glorious evening. It had
    gotten quite late when she motioned for the pencil and
    drew a picture of a four-poster bed.

    He was dumbfounded. To this day he says that he's never
    been able to understand how she knew he was in the
    furniture business.
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  2. 03-01-2002, 05:41 PM #647
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    Re: Re: Cap is NOT my cousin

    Originally posted by Eldest_One
    dl you can tell us the truth were all friends here that story is about you isn't it. There is no need to be ashamed about a little mis-understanding.

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  3. 03-01-2002, 06:08 PM #648
    dlcampbe
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    Re: Re: Cap is NOT my cousin

    Originally posted by Eldest_One
    dl you can tell us the truth were all friends here that story is about you isn't it. There is no need to be ashamed about a little mis-understanding.

    Weeellllllll..............
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  4. 03-01-2002, 06:35 PM #649
    {Tigress}
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    A very successful businessman and his wife were at dinner one evening. During the meal, an extremely attractive young woman came up to the man, leaned down and kissed his cheek, and then whispered, "see you later, sweetie", and walked away. The wife was dumbfounded!

    "Who was THAT tramp?", she asked.

    "That was my mistress.", said the businessman.

    "Your WHAT???", exclaimed the wife. "I won't have it, I tell you! It's either me OR her! You can't have both!!"

    "If you want to be that way, fine. I'll have my attorney draw up the divorce papers in the morning.", the husband calmly said.

    "Good!", said the wife, angerily.

    "Just remember," cautioned the husband, "a divorce will mean no more shopping trips to Paris, no more Mink coats, no more expensive cars, no chalet in Sweden, nothing."

    The wife just glared at him in silence.

    A few minutes later, the wife saw her husband's partner walk into the restaurant, and on his arm was another young, attractive female, who was NOT the partner's wife.

    "Who is HE with?, asked the wife, nodding in the man's direction.

    Her husband turned and looked, and explained, "That's Elaine, John's mistress."

    To which the wife replied, "Oh. Well, our's is prettier."

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  5. 03-03-2002, 01:05 PM #650
    Dok
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    Ha ha ha ha! My wife says thanks too!
    Dok

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  6. 03-03-2002, 04:58 PM #651
    {Tigress}
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    Originally posted by Dok
    Ha ha ha ha! My wife says thanks too!
    Yeah, it's a funny thing about that joke... if you tell a young female (under 25) she'll be insulted, the rest of us know the truth! lol

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  7. 03-03-2002, 05:00 PM #652
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    Originally posted by {Tigress}


    Yeah, it's a funny thing about that joke... if you tell a young female (under 25) she'll be insulted, the rest of us know the truth! lol
    What you mean you are not under 25!!!!
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  8. 03-03-2002, 05:04 PM #653
    dlcampbe
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    Originally posted by Eldest_One


    What you mean you are not under 25!!!!
    Ha! she's the same age as my daughter

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  9. 03-03-2002, 05:04 PM #654
    {Tigress}
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    Originally posted by Eldest_One


    What you mean you are not under 25!!!!
    Aren't you just the sweetest man on the planet, next to Tigs.

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  10. 03-03-2002, 05:05 PM #655
    dlcampbe
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    Originally posted by {Tigress}


    Aren't you just the meanest man on the planet, next to Steamer.
    Me!

    Last edited by Eldest_One; 03-03-2002 at 05:07 PM.
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  11. 03-03-2002, 05:06 PM #656
    Elephant Man
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    Originally posted by dlcampbe


    Not me!
    We knew that.
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  12. 03-03-2002, 05:07 PM #657
    {Tigress}
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    Originally posted by dlcampbe


    Not me!
    No dl, not you. You're in a class all your own. Well maybe shared with Steamer, but THAT's it!

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  13. 03-03-2002, 05:10 PM #658
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    Originally posted by {Tigress}


    No dl, not you. You're in a class all your own. Well maybe shared with Steamer, but THAT's it!
    Foul! Low blow!
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  14. 03-03-2002, 05:13 PM #659
    {Tigress}
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    Originally posted by Steamer

    Foul! Low blow!
    Wow! I'm that good of an aim, huh?

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  15. 03-03-2002, 05:17 PM #660
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    Originally posted by {Tigress}


    Wow! I'm that good of an aim, huh?
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